One of the less than awesome things about moving to Sweden is the fact that I have so many more students, so much more grading, so much more teaching and so much less time to read and think and research than I did when I was in Texas. This also means most of what I am reading is for the benefit of others (textbooks for lesson planning, emails, curriculum documents, student papers and exams) and not for the benefit of my own mind or personal development. I feel a part of myself withering away and feel a whole host of other negative feelings that undermine my self-confidence.
We have exactly 5 weeks of official summer vacation when there are no resit exams, bizarre time-wasting projects for faculty, and students sending demanding emails, and I am trying to do as much as possible in these 5 weeks. This includes reading and reading and reading. And it feels so good. It's like my brain is coming back online.
I have finished four books so far, some for fun (His Last Bow) and some for research/writing purposes (Convergence Culture; The Language of Social Media). I set aside time to read and take notes on 4 different texts at a time, so I don't get bored. Today's set of readings also includes 10 pages from Richard III in preparation for my trip to London to see Martin Freeman and his amazing beard on stage. I've also got a list of tasks both work (green) and fun (pink) that I am checking off for all of the things I read and do. And absolutely none of this has to do with grading or teaching.
It feels so good to be using my brain again and making connections. We'll see how much I get through, but hopefully it will be enough to rebuild my confidence and to energize me for all the new teaching I'll be facing in the fall.
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